


Fly Me To The Moon

by sarahspoonhands, wings_g_leviosa



Category: IT (2017), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Angst, Coming Out, Fluff, High School, M/M, Pennywise is gone for good, Reddie, probably a lot of angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-30
Updated: 2017-10-03
Packaged: 2019-01-07 03:29:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,870
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12224820
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sarahspoonhands/pseuds/sarahspoonhands, https://archiveofourown.org/users/wings_g_leviosa/pseuds/wings_g_leviosa
Summary: Richie knew Eddie was gay. He’d known from the time they were 13. They were best friends, so of course Richie comforted him when Eddie began having nightmares following the death of It. They had many sleepovers with the Losers Club in the months following the attacks. It was during one of these that Eddie finally divulged what really terrified him about the leper form that It took.





	1. A Nickel, A Dime

Derry was one of those towns that never really changed, no matter how much time passed. The tall trees that lined the streets still swayed in the breeze. The sun cast a nostalgic, orange glow over every citizen and building within the city limits. 

A run down, second hand car raced through the streets, thoroughly shattering the illusion of the perfect town. Music blared obnoxiously from the subpar speakers and the peeling blue paint winked in the high noon sun. 

Richie Tozier, behind the wheel of said car, had not slept the night before. He had lay awake until the wee hours of the morning, thoughts racing around in circles, taunting and screaming. They did the same thing now, so he forced himself to concentrate on something else. 

He felt heat seeping into his legs through the paper bag in his lap, and heard a sound of distress from the seat next to him. Right, Eddie was in the car as well.

“I’ve seen blind people drive better than you, Richie Tozier.”

“I’m trying not to spill our lunch, Eds. Don’t doubt my efforts.”

Eddie scowled at the nickname, before reaching over the console and relieving Richie’s lap of the paper bag. 

“The food will be knocked over if we get in a car cra- EYES ON THE ROAD!”

Richie screeched to a stop upon registering the flash of a red stop sign. Eddie put his arm out to brace himself against the dashboard, jolting forward in his seat. Richie looked over, grinning at his friend. His brown hair had fallen into his eyes a little, cheeks pink from exclusion and heat. Richie forced his eyes away and continued back down the path to their high school. 

“We should change your name from Trashmouth to Trash Driver, I swear to God.”

“Oh, come on Eddie Spaghetti, I know you love the thrill of a good ol’ drive.

Eddie made a frustrated noise.

“For the final fucking time, don’t call me that. And you shouldn’t be giving anyone rides ever again.”

“Your mom would beg to differ.”

“Beep beep, asshole,” but Eddie grinned a little, so Richie knew he wasn’t mad, not really.  
Richie allowed himself to look over at his companion out of the corner of his eye. His hands were fiddling with the edge of the paper bag in his lap, face passive and content. He pulled a bit of his lip between his teeth, biting off some of the chapped skin there. He must have forgotten his chapstick that day. But just as Eddie started to look back, Richie snapped his head back, looking at the road.

Don’t think about it, don’t think about it, don’t think about it, he recited in his head, nearly white-knuckling the steering wheel. His skin prickled as he felt Eddie’s eyes turn to him. 

“You okay Trashmouth? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

The lie bubbled out of his mouth easier than anything.

“Yeah, just didn’t sleep last night. That mother of yours…” Richie smiled and shook his head, but the joke was half-hearted. 

Eddie rolled his eyes.

“Stop avoiding the question. Was it, y'know,” he nervously runs his tongue across his lip, “It?” Richie’s hands gripped the steering wheel a little harder.

“Yeah, it was.” The half truth might as well have been a lie as well. But Eddie nodded in understanding.

“What did It do?” 

It had you.

“It had all of you, down in the well.”

The leper had you in the well. 

“You were all caught in the deadlights.”

He kept whispering to you. A nickel, a dime, for free. “Come on Eddie, be just like me.”

“I couldn’t reach any of you.”

I couldn’t move, I couldn’t scream. I’m so sorry.

“I get what you mean. That’s terrible Richie.”

I’msorryI’msorryI’msorryIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIlo-

“Yeah. It wasn’t the greatest,” He turned and grinned at Eddie, “But seeing your beautiful mug makes it all better.” Richie pinched Eddie’s cheek, earning him a swat on the arm. 

“Quit it. Make sure you don’t hit anyone.” Richie gave a mock salute, screeching into the parking lot of Derry High. He could spot all of their friends sitting underneath the shade of one of the large trees littered around campus. They all turned at the sound of the car squealing to a halt, grimaces contorting their faces as Richie clambered out of the driver’s seat. 

“Oi, ya wankers, all rise for provisions,” he bolstered, slipping into one of his voices.

“I can’t even tell what that’s supposed to be,” Ben quipped, followed by a barrage of beep beep, Richie shortly thereafter.

“I’m never riding in a car with him ever again,” Eddie said, sitting down in the grass and pulling food from the paper bag. Everyone began scrambling to grab their order, the sounds of paper and tin foil crumpling overtaking the conversation. With the group all engrossed in their food, Richie allowed himself to steal a look at Eddie once again. 

Richie knew Eddie was queer. He’d known from the time they were 13. They were best friends, so of course Richie comforted him when Eddie began having nightmares following the death of It. They had many sleepovers with the Losers Club in the months following the attacks. Of course they did, but not near as much as the ones where just Richie and Eddie were present. It was during one of these that Eddie finally divulged what really terrified him about the leper form that It took.

“He kept offering to… do things. Sexual things. He said I could pay him a nickel, then a dime, and then for free. H-he almost got me, Richie,” he whispered, curled up in the corner of Richie’s bed in one of their rare quiet moments. Richie had wrapped his arms around his friend, in an attempt to even provide some comfort.

“That’s awful. But it’s over now, Eds. It’s dead.”

“He told me… he told me he could teach me to be just like him.”

“You couldn’t ever be like him. You’re not a monster.”

He mumbled something then, too softly for Richie to hear him. 

“What’s that?”

“... What if I am like him?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, what if I don’t like girls? What if the leper was right?”

Richie was taken aback for a moment, before finally just gripping his friend tighter, placing a hand on his soft brown hair. 

“Then more girls for me, I guess,” he said with a chuckle. Eddie sniffed, but Richie could feel his shoulders ease a little. “Seriously, Eddie, why would that make me stop being your friend? You aren’t any different than before. Besides, it’s not like you’d ever like me, I already drive you nuts.”

“I guess you’re right. Thank you Richie.”

Thank you Richie.

Richie.

Richie.

“Richie!”

He jumped at the sound of Eddie shouting his name, the entire Losers Club staring at him.

“What? My dick hanging out the bottom of my pants again?”

“Shut up. We were talking about prom,” Stan mumbled stoutly, words slightly garbled through the food in his mouth. 

“What about prom? It’s a cesspool of sex and angst, what’s new?” Eddie snarked, tearing off a bit of burrito with his teeth. 

“Yeah, and that’s before I get there,” Richie said with a wink. Everyone ignored him. 

“W-who would a-any of us even ask?” asked Bill, verbally stumbling into the conversation. 

Immediately, Richie casts a look over at Eddie. His heart palpitated, but he forced his body to stop it. 

“Don’t you worry guys, I’ll have the hottest babe in the land on my arm. Oh and we’ll dance and dance,” he stood, swinging his burrito around like one might carry a dance partner or lover. This demonstration, however, proved to be fruitless, as his food eventually slipped free of it’s tin foil skirt, flying through the air and landing on the ground with a moist thud. 

“Fuck. Thar she blows,” Richie muttered. Eddie, who’d been watching this display in a perpetual state of doneness, exhaled sharply, before offering half of his sandwich to Richie. He accepted it gratefully, trying not to let his thoughts linger on the brief contact of their fingers.

“Good ol’ Eds, keeping me fed and happy. You’ll make a great wife someday.”

“In your dreams, Trashmouth. At least I have some future prospects.”

They went back and forth like this, like nearly every day of their lives. But Richie’s mind couldn’t stop wandering. Did he want more than this? Did he even know anything about himself? 

What do you want?

What do you want? 

What do you want?

Was he like Eddie?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you like this fic, wings_g_levisoa and I are really excited to be working on it! We'll be updating every few days so be sure to stay tuned. Come over and talk to me on Tumblr: http://starks-and-skywalkers.tumblr.com/ and wings_g_leviosa: http://cacti-cool.tumblr.com/, we would love to gush about Reddie with you. Thank you so much for reading!


	2. 3:48 a.m.

Eddie had decided not to ask Richie for a ride home from school that day. It wasn’t that his best friend’s driving had scared him, the multiple near death experiences per drive were practically normal by this point. 

No, the reason Eddie had chosen to trek to the barrens by himself instead of listening to records and pretending to do homework with Richie like they had done nearly every day for the past four years was because he was beginning to come to terms with the fact that he was in love with him. He supposed he had always been, for as long as he could remember. At least since the summer they fought It. He hadn’t even admitted to himself he was gay until then.

Everything in his life had come crashing down in an instant. He was confronted by the leper, telling Eddie that who he really was was disgusting. He learned that his mother had spent his whole life manipulating and controlling him, making him think he was too sickly to do anything by himself.

It was Richie who made Eddie realize that he was strong enough to handle it. He told Eddie it didn’t matter if he was gay. He reassured him that he was doing the right thing by cutting his mom out of all of the parts of his life that he could. The two boys became even more joined at the hip than they already were. Eddie couldn’t begin to imagine what his life would be like without him. 

For the life of him, Eddie couldn’t pinpoint exactly when he had fallen in love with Richie. All he knew was that the prospect of seeing Richie dance with someone else at prom made his throat tighten like a fake asthma attack. He didn’t want Richie’s big smile, beautiful cheekbones and unruly curls to belong to anyone else.

He held his head in between his bent knees and tried not cry. He felt as though his heart was being squeezed. It was too much.

“Eddie?” He heard a voice sound from behind him. He whipped his head around and saw Bill standing by the tree line, looking at him. “Are you okay?”

He stood up quickly and turned around to face him. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

Bill made his way over to him and scanned his face skeptically. “You don't look fine.” His friend sat down and Eddie moved to do the same. 

“W-w-what’s wrong?” Bill asked. 

Eddie sighed. He wanted to talk to someone about it, but he just couldn’t.

“I-I come down here a lot,” Bill said, “It’s a good place to w-write.” He took out a spiral notebook, opening it to a page half filled with illegible scrawling. “It always makes me r-r-remember that It is g-gone when I’m upset. Is th-that what’s going on with you?”

Eddie guessed that maybe it was a little bit of that. Thinking about his sexuality always brought up images of the leper, and he supposed it always would. 

“It’s just, prom I guess,” he said, picking at his thumbnail, “It’s stressing me out.”

“Worried about w-who to go with?”

Eddie snorted. As if that was all. “It’s more complicated than that.”

Bill shrugged and looked over to him. “It shouldn’t be. I-i-f you like them, and they like you, it shouldn’t have to be c-complicated.”

Eddie looked away from his friend. Pursing his lips, he wracked his brain trying to figure out if Bill knew. He hadn’t told anyone except Richie and he knew that he wouldn’t blab something like that, no matter how much of a trashmouth he was. 

“I’m not g-”

“I didn’t say you were a-a-anything,” Bill said, raising arms in defense.

Eddie felt like his stomach was going to fall out of his ass. He didn’t know if he was ready for everything that would come with admitting this about himself. It wasn’t like he would be telling the whole world though. This was just Bill.

“What if I was?” he asked quietly, looking out at the water. Bill turned to face him so fast that Eddie jumped back.

“E-eddie, that w-w-would be fine, more than f-fine. N-none of us would juh-judge you,” Bill said hurriedly. 

The world seemed to brighten just a little bit for Eddie. He let out a long breath, like Richie had taught him to do when he felt a panic attack coming on. This wasn’t a panic attack though. It was whatever the opposite of that was, like a two ton weight beginning to lift off of him, but it was just as scary.

“Don’t tell anyone else right now,” Eddie said, “I just… need some time.”

“O-of course,” Bill said.

They sat there for a long time, Bill scribbling in his notebook and Eddie drawing lines in the dirt with a stick, thinking. The comfortable silence was rare for him. For once he didn’t feel like he wanted to crawl out of his own skin. 

By the time he got home that evening, he was feeling much better. He was able to finish his homework and have a fairly civil dinner with his mother (who he now referred to as Sonia). He got into bed feeling that maybe he could fall asleep easily for the first time in recent memory.

Of course, that didn’t happen. He adjusted back to his usual routine of switching between staring up at the shadows on the ceiling and laying on his side trying to keep his eyes closed. He had been laying there for a long stretch of time when he heard a rap on his window. 

He sat bolt upright and looked out to see Richie standing there. He raised an eyebrow at him, but opened the window all the same. 

“Hey,” Richie said, awkwardly.

“Hey,” Eddie replied, “Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, I just…” Richie looked down at his feet, “I had another nightmare.” Eddie noticed his bed head curls and dark eye bags. 

“Come in, loser,” Eddie said, stepping back from the window. Richie bumped his head on the way in, his lanky form not used to fitting into tight spaces. He hadn’t snuck over like this in years. 

The two boys sat on Eddie’s bed in silence for a moment, neither one entirely sure what to say. Eddie’s heart was thumping faster than he would have liked. 

“I’m sorry,” Richie finally said, completely free of his usual jokester demeanor.

“Shut up,” Eddie said, “You helped me when I was going through this.”

“I know. I just needed to see you, Eddie Spaghetti.” He looked over at the small boy, his eyes watery. Eddie’s heart ached for his best friend. 

He remembered the way Richie would soothe him when he woke up crying or in a cold sweat. He would wrap his arms around him and hold him against his chest. Sleep would eventually find him again as Richie whispered against his hair and traced small circles against his back.

Richie was shaking and looked close to tears. Eddie had never seen him this upset before. 

Eddie pushed back the covers and slid his legs underneath. “You can stay,” he said. Cold from the Maine night seeped through the sheets as Richie settled in beside him. 

“Eds?”

“Hmm?”

“Thank you.”

Richie rolled over to face him. Unsure of what to say, Eddie pulled his friend against him and slung his arms around him. Even though he was taller, Richie curled against Eddie and rested his head on his chest. 

“Good night, Trashmouth.”

The red light of his alarm clock read 3:48 when Eddie woke up again. The two boys hadn’t moved much. Richie was sound asleep, his quiet breathing the only noise in the room.

Eddie wrapped a curl around his finger. He wished he knew what was going on with his friend, why he was having these nightmares. They had always told each other everything, Eddie didn’t want that to change. 

Sleeping, Richie looked so content, like how he looked when he made the whole gang laugh. Eddie wanted to press a kiss against his head. He wanted to run a hand through his hair. Richie would wake up, still half asleep and smile at him. Maybe they would go back to sleep. Maybe they would stay up talking. 

Eddie felt the tears begin to leak down his cheeks. He knew he could never have that. Richie would never love him that way.

He knew he needed to move on. He loved this boy more than anything in the world and it was killing him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a lot of angst, SORRY. Thanks for all the support!


End file.
